the end

what is of essence is nt the time which passed,
but how you spend it.

one and a half years is long time,
which was short,
but as it is,
it has passed.

time t appreciate this blog's title.
all said,
let fate decide.
trust luck.

t my hsmates,

i ll enjoy the moments of stress where craziness overtake us,
the second-hand smoke from brunei,
the times we laughed,
the times we laugh even louder,
and,
yeah,
thx 4 ur coms.

there are no strangers. only friends we haven meet.

whats worth more than a friend?


a girlfriend?


***

a true friend is one whos stabs u in the front.


who forgives and forgets.


who finds peace.


in friends.

***

yet there 'friends' who value other friends over some.


yet there are friends who are misuse the value of being friends.


***

i was one.


till i realised how stupid this was.


better to be construstive,


than destructive.


***

nobody normally wants to hurt anybody.


neither do i.

***

yet whats worth more than a friend?


***

haha...
screw this post.

i found peace.
this blog is no longer necessary.

perfect art.

the art of making fun of urself.

of laughing at urself.

of absorbing the joke.

of being the joke.

is the most beautiful art of all.

the clown in u.

express it.

laugh at urself.

and people will laugh with u.

nirvana doesnt last.

i walked to ac.

everytin still felt acute.

hsmate asked me y im nt eatin.

told him later.

they waited 4 me.

dint want t care.

at last i gave in to nt making them awkward.

1st gulp of food.

fading.

2nd gulp.

fading.

3rd gulp.

gone.

like some kind of loss.

frustrated.

dint show.

my face is a bit weird.

cant seem to make an angry or sad face.

its either emotionless.

or smiling.

lasted 4 i dont know how long.

then.

something snapped.

i dint care bout what i did.

i dint care what others think of me.

it just snapped.

***

i had this feel of being mentally retarded.

of being seriously stupid.

it lifted.

then.

gone.

***

its no forsaken explanation.

but i ve no other.

***

but still this time im free.

again.

and im keepin it that way.

nirvana.

i was depressed.

and retarded.

and felt stupid.

cant even get that useless glycolysis into my neuroneless brain.

simply got up.

took my key.

opened prison's gate.

went down.

aimless.

walked to ac.

turned back.

went to swimming pool.

soaked feet.

9.25 seconds.

went to mini park.

sat on slide.

looked into the clouds.

they appear not moving.

yet were moving.

for an hour.

people passed.

there was an ant on my leg.

mosquitoes were all around.

suprisingly none bit me.

some eye within me open.

i could see.

the world was getting normal.

the eye of my childhood.

when i was not yet retarded.

i am free.

valentines

it all started on monday i think.
ko unleashed his valentines plan on us.

'we have 12 girls and 11 guys in the class.
y not we jus draw lots and have couples for valentines?
and one lucky guy gets 2 girls.'

lol.
we were supposed to be sporting.
at least its better than the cucumbers we gave the girls last year.

further discussion brought down to alyssa being exempted as shes nt single.

drew.
got a 4.

well, its sure funny as each couple was revealed.
any1 gettin kong will be sure suprised.
underneath his roundness....
is a baby dragon.

zhen got me.

house rules:
must get something 4 partner.
sit together, lunch together..
lol...

i was lazy to think.
seriously.

so i did it the daniel way.

collected data from various sources.
compounded it.
and form a complex compound.

lol.
some suggestions were more outrageous than tunas.
for goodness sake? basketballs?

***

well, even the florist is against me:

'flowers for valentines day?'

'yup. do u have hibiscus?'

no joke man, she flared up like an angry mung bean.

'no, our shop dont sell hibiscus. u want, u go to the roadside and pick. no, i tell u, our shop dont sell hibiscus.'

imagine timothy in full bitch mode. lol.

'so, errr what bout these?'
i took some white flowers.
they look like those u see when u go to funerals.
nt bad, funeral flowers 4 valentines.
sniff*
its beautiful.

'u said its 4 valentines? dont take them. usually ppl will get roses, not that.'

lol.
whats her problem?
i was about to give her a sureshan frown.
then i thought better of it.
no time.
grabbed some bright yellow brush.

' ill take this.'

she gave me some dirty cross disgusted frown.
then passed them to an old woman.
and turn back to her telephone askin bout some visma place near kepong.

***

i need to get the tuna out before the flower.
feel like punking her.

sharon.
an angel.

well, she did suffer a bit on my behalf.
holdin d yellow stuff.
kena shoot straight away by su ern and zhen when they came.

lol.
zhen was like in hysterics when i gave her the tunas can by can.
6 of them.
well, i do need to work on my expressionless blur face more.
but i cant let sharon get underfire for longer.
i do owe her a lot.

then only i gave the flowers.

and i got chocolate milk packets.
6 of them.








i messaged my hsmate,
'lol...'




his reply?
' oh lord jesus'