of cockroaches and detergents

please note that the conversations below are not 101% accurate due to short term memory loss n cos i deleted my messages in my phone cos no memory.

conversation 1
-just have t tell smone, i wasted half a bottle of dishwashin detergent t kill two mating cckroaches. n cleanin up wa so heavenly.
-lol. nyerrr...
-they mate dont use raspberry flavoured condom 1.
-they use spermicide.
-no la, they use lemon smellin detergents. i gave them a bit too much, they got so high that they die of estasy.
-who ask you keep viagra-like substance in your room...
-ohhhhhhhh nooooooo, how u kno ar? ( actually i dont)
-of course la, even d maids who clean ur room oso kena d.
-no la, actually i keep in my hsmates masterbedroom. dats y its called masturbate room. my room now smells of lemons.
-lol. nyerrrrrr...
-lazy talk to u d, make me sound so dirty, im innocent 1, u kno? i seriously like chocolate milk, root beer n apple juice only.

conversation 2
-just have t tell smone, i wasted half a bottle of dishwashin detergent t kill two mating cckroaches. n cleanin up wa so heavenly.
-half a bottle? mating?
- yup, they mate very interestin 1, u kno? one on top of d other, so syok, n i drown them in lemon smellin detergent and they die in syokness.
-haha..should have just smacked them.
-their position very strategic, scared smack them, 1 squashed, d other go hide take revenge n obey god by going forth n multiply.
- haha... at least its better they dint go n have a family in ur room.
-yeah, n my room smells of lemons.
-consider urself lucky, cockroach mating very rare to observe 1, hw many ppl want t see oso cannot, nex time ask jo ee t search on youtube.
-dont worry, i will.

conversation 3
-just have t tell smone, i wasted half a bottle of dishwashin detergent t kill two mating cckroaches. n cleanin up wa so heavenly.
-huh? half a bottle of detergent? u really hate cockroaches.
-haha... nothing against them, its jus they were doin smthg they shouldnt do in public and in a corner where i cant even smack them. do u like cockroaches?
- nope, of course not.
-i think im a bit sadistic, makin cockraoches die of estasy on lemon smellin detergent. is it wrong t kill them? cos imagine u r a cockroach, havin d time of ur life when u get drowned by lemon smellin liquid. its a bit unfair, since u did nothing wrong but exist.
-haha...funny way t describe.. dont think its wrong.
- but if u magnify d image, drownin humans in lemon smellin detergent while they r matin. r humans that more important than cockroaches? is d life of an advanced primate more important than that of an insect?
- haha... as long as they keep away from me, i dont care.